real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
So I just found out that my mom and dad arent married
What? They have three kids?
Yep. And apparently I have a half brother. Happy Birthday to me
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
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