No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
I could make wine with my vomit
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
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