i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
Randomize
