some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
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