i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
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