plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
Randomize
