she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
but dude how did I get so drunk?
Pretty sure it happened right after you poured a shot of Wild Turkey into your Budweiser, chugged it, and screamed "I. NEVER. BACK. DOWN!"
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
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