I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
It's like God shit irony all over that family
It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
Jesus fucking Mary Christ if I have to clean shit out of my fucking bathtub one more fucking time I'm gonna murder a fucking kitten
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
Randomize
