: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
So I'm driving and this guy next to me at the stop light is reving his engine and honking at me. Motherfucker thinks that's because I'm asian and drive a honda I'm automatically going to race him
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
Just saw an old lady vomit in a trash can at the airport. I instinctively called her a pussy. College has ruined us.
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
Just got arrested in my crocs and rolled up pants with a mr rogers sweater for literally fucking nothing can u come get me?
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
One of your 'guests' left her bra in the kitchen.
Dude, does it look like any of the women I bring home wear bras?
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
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