He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
