Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
it's like iHOP with fire
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
Randomize
