When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
Randomize
