everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
and he says: but we did find out that your ovaries have never released eggs. first thing out of my mouth: so i didnt really need to take the morning after pill so many times in college?
not the response he usually gets im sure.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
I’m not spending 14 dollars on a margarita unless it’s rimmed with cocaine... actually do you have a blender?
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
Randomize