I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
And one night I got way too drunk and thought he said call me a polish name so I called him Konrad. Now he thinks I cheated on him with a Konrad.
That's my new pick up line call me a polish name
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Randomize
