with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
You caught me at a bad time. I'm stoned enough that I'm ready to sleep but also not stoned enough that I wanna smoke again but also stoned enough to not wanna drive anywhere
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
Your Saturday night was spent at the opera, mine was spent exchanging naked pics with a hot middle aged man that is so ripped that he looks like he's photoshopped. This is why we're blood sisters. We balance each other out.
I hate you so hard.
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Randomize