Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
She's making her own pesto again. Cooking spaghetti in the microwave and "frying" vegetables in the toaster oven. All this while wearing the yellow rubber gloves and saying that the pesto has feelings like a real person. Im terrified.
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
Randomize
