So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
Randomize
