Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
Just saw an old lady vomit in a trash can at the airport. I instinctively called her a pussy. College has ruined us.
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
Dude. Went to buy some jack and sailor Jerry, when the guy at the counter realized it was my birthday everybody in the store including the stoners and the elderly sang to me. Then they gave me shots of moonshine. 21st bday was a success
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
Randomize
