Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
Randomize
