I wanna passion pit in your ass
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
That accounts for only three of the penises
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Randomize
