so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
It was like getting head from an anaconda
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
Pretty sure the delivery guy saw me taking a shit this morning
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
Randomize