wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
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