I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
Randomize