ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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