Sorry, its so late. Remember your fat friend with huge boobs. i need her number..its an emergency
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
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