Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
Hey had an urgent voicemail from the Illinois national guard....have you been using my identity for your blackout weekend?
Yes and yes
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
WTF ARE YOU DOING IT'S FUCKING VEGAN COFFEE IT'S MADE WITH NUT MILK YOU'RE NOT A FUCKING SQUIRREL.
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