we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
Somedays I wish I were a bird. Then people wouldn't be so grossed out when I vomit
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
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