he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
Randomize