i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
It's my coworker's last day party and I'm the one who ended up shitfaced on the train with half a bottle of belvedere in my bag.
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
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