So right when I was pulling her underwear off with my teeth, she told me, "Stick your penis in my 'nanners." Needless to say, there was no penis-'nanner interaction.
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
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