I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
Life lesson: Don't give a drunk girl a dutch oven after having taco bell. She puked all over my pillow. Funny as hell though.
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
Randomize
