sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
Watching Fresh Prince at 9am with a beer in hand and he just said to Uncle Phil "Sometimes I worry that I'll never get my life together." I feel like that was a sign from above or something
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
I was doing drugs in the men's room so my employee went in to the woman's for the same reason but left proof and got caught. Had to fire him cuz I bogarted his dope spot. Awesome.
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
Randomize