I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
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