I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
how do flat chested girls get laid?
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
Randomize
