When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize
