K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
When are your genitals available?
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Randomize
