He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
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