i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
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