Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
You disappeared for an hour and showed back up with handfuls of bratwursts and yelled at my girlfriend that if she didn't eat them, that the nazis win
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
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