your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
Randomize
