then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
23 Millennials Confess The Things They Wish They Weren’t Attracted To
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
23 Gruesome Scientific Facts That Will Make You Squirm
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
The feeling are messing with the penis
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
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