Screwed.edu
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
the people of mcdonalds are all starring at me & this dude like they know we just slept together
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
Randomize
