Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
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