I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
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