Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
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