brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
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I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
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