Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
I started singing the national anthem on a train in London. Happy 4th of July assholes
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
Randomize
