so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
only if we run a train.
done.
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize
