The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
Wedding update: no alcohol, 75% of people have left, no one is dancing, no single groomsmen, and it's 5:30. I'm going the fuck home to drink by myself.
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
Randomize
