Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
Randomize
