who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
Randomize